www.silverguide.site –

Have you ever won a spelling bee?

No! I don’t think I’ve entered any formalised spelling competition. When I was eight or nine, there was a guy who I used to copy during tests. We were doing a spelling test and the word was “vehicle” and he made an absolutely terrible attempt at it. I knew he’d spelled it wrong and was like, wait – have I been copying someone who’s more stupid than me this whole time?

Which word do you hate the most?

None! That’s crazy! I love all words. They’re just out there, doing their best.

Who would you like to play you in the biopic about your life?

I used to get compared to Paul Bettany a lot. He’s older than me, but I think he’s got range; he can have a crack.

Your assistant Aaron Chen has left Guy Montgomery’s Guy Mont Spelling Bee for the United States. Do you miss Aaron or is Sam Campbell the superior assistant?

I do miss Aaron. And Sam is a fantastic assistant. You’re not going to get me that easy! I’ve been media trained by the guy who does all the professional sports players.

I love Aaron. Making a show with him is such a dream. I never would have asked for him to leave. But he’s in the ascendancy. He’s a star. So the likelihood of him being able to come back from New York to film Spelling Bee was always going to be low. So to fill the void with Sam – I hold very few comedians in my esteem as I do Aaron, but Sam is amongst them, so I feel blessed. I look up to both of them as comedians, so to get to work with them has been a dream.

What is the biggest misconception about New Zealand?

Man, I don’t even know what the conceptions of New Zealand are any more. I think everyone’s so busy looking at countries visibly destroying everything, we’re kind of under the radar. What are the conceptions about New Zealand?

It is now full of prepper billionaires and very expensive.

Well we do have a few billionaires and it is unbelievably expensive to live there at the moment, especially in Auckland, where I live. Groceries, petrol obviously – the basic stuff that you would never consider a luxury has gone crazy. I don’t think there are any misconceptions.

What has been your most memorable interaction with a fan?

When my friend Tim [Batt] and I first did our podcast, The Worst Idea of All Time, we crowdfunded a trip to Los Angeles to put on a live show there. We were young and silly and we’d stay with fans to save money. I wouldn’t race to stay with fans again. There was one guy who took us back to his house and showed us all his guns and we were like “Ohhhh!” He was enthusiastic and lovely, he was just mental. I think he had really rich parents. It was kind of like living on a different plane of reality. I remember we were looking at the guns and thinking, “Maybe we should start paying to stay in neutral settings.”

What are you secretly really good at?

I got incredibly house-broken growing up. I hold the cleanliness of the sink, the stacking and unstacking of the dishwasher, even the way the laundry is hung out, to an unnecessarily pedantic standard. I’m also really, really, really good at falling asleep at night. It’s cash money. In my brain there’s this massive “power off” button, and I can just feel a hand reaching out to hold down the button and it just shuts all systems down. My beloved partner Chelsea will be sat next to me throwing all variety of conversation topics at me to try and stop me from pressing the button – but it is a very powerful button …

If you had a sandwich named after you, what would be in it?

OK. I’m starting with fresh mozzarella. I’m putting rocket and a chilli onion jam in. Listen to me go! I’m putting butter on both pieces of bread, and avocado on one. I’m putting heirloom tomatoes in there. I’m wondering if I should put bacon or chicken in there. No – I’ll put both! It’s my sandwich! This is not an everyday sandwich! This is a maybe once-a-month sandwich! It feels like quite a decadent sandwich.

Who is the most famous New Zealander you know?

What is the metric for knowing? Like to stop and say hi if I ran into them on the street? I know Flight of the Conchords well enough to say “What’s up?” Actually, I know former New Zealand prime minister Jacinda Ardern well enough to be like, “Hey, how you are going?” We met because I was in an improv comedy troupe for 10 years. We performed in Auckland Central all the time and she was just an MP in Auckland Central then. So she saw us perform a lot, because if you’re the minister for Auckland Central it’s a good idea to get to know the arts community. She was very friendly to us. She’s lovely.

Would you rather die at the bottom of the ocean or out in space?

They’re both good options, to be honest. Either way you’re making a statement. Not one that people would know about because obviously you’ve been marooned in either setting. Actually, what’s crazy is that in both instances I’m annoyed that I don’t get to tell people that’s how I die.

We could get an audience to watch you die if you want.

No, I just want it to be reported on. Those guys died in that submarine recently, and everyone made fun of them. So I’ll take space. I don’t want to get bullied for dying at the bottom of the ocean.

I think it would probably make the news that Guy Montgomery died in space.

You reckon? That’s quite a nice thought.

• Guy Montgomery’s Guy Mont Spelling Bee season three airs on Wednesdays at 8:35pm on ABC TV. All three seasons are available to stream on ABC iview